Fighting the Dream

CHAPTER ONE

“I’ve found him.”

“Who?”

“Your dream man.”

“Charlie.” Mick said in quiet exasperation. He took a deep breath to stem the building anger. He really was sick of this. “We’ve been over this a million times. What the fuck man? Do I go around looking for guys I feel you’d be attracted to and throwing them in your face? I said it before and I say it again. No. Fucking. Threesomes. Type or not.”

He walked off towards the kitchen, fuming.

True to form, Charlie followed him, not caring that he was upsetting his boyfriend. He grabbed at the much smaller man and pulled his back to his chest, nuzzling into his neck. Mick wasn’t buying it though. He pushed him off and went over to the fridge, dragging the large door open.

He needed a drink for this bullshit.

Charlie stood at the back of the fridge door, waiting for him to finish rummaging. “Come on Mick. It’s only for one night. What’s the big deal?”

He slammed the bottle on the worktop. Charlie flinched. Mick glared at him.

“Why don’t you just admit it’s the threesome you want for yourself? It’s got nothing to do with finding me “my type”. Two fingers crooked up in the air by his head for emphasis. “I’ve got you. What good would it do having sex with my so called type? What’s the point?”

“It’s your fantasy. You have a chance to experience it…”

“I do not want to sleep with some strange man just to fulfill some fantasy you seem to think I have. I have you-”

“Yeah you have me.” Charlie acquiesced with a smirk. “But I’m not tall enough am I? Or huge enough. I don’t look like I can throw you over my shoulder and head off into the sunset. My hands aren’t large enough, nor my fingers long enough, my-“

“Stop, okay!” Mick grabbed a glass from the top cabinet and poured the cider into it.

“What? It’s true.”

“For the last time. I’m attracted to huge men. It doesn’t mean I want to fuck every one of them I see on the street for goodness sake! I don’t believe in sex for the sake of it. That isn’t me Charlie, why can’t you accept that?” No answer. “I’m with you, aren’t I?”

“Yes but…”

“But what?”

“This would be fulfilling your… okay, maybe not your fantasy…”

“Exactly. Your fantasy. Not mine…”

“Yeah. Okay. It’s not a big deal.”

“It is to me!” Mick growled. “I’m not into sharing Charles! It’s just not what people do… not people in proper relationships.”

“Come here.’ Mick was pulled into strong arms. “We’re in a proper relationship Mick. People do this all the time. Once you get the hang of it…”

The small man pushed Charlie away with all his might. “Once I get the hang of it?” He gasped incredulously. “Are you nuts??? I’m not doing this more than once.”

Charlie’s handsome face beamed. “So you’ll do it then.”

Mick cringed at his mistake. Damn Charlie. “Only the once. Never again. I’m not even sure I can do this at all.”

“It’ll be fine…”

“It’s not a good idea. I just know its not. I don’t know why you want to do this.”

Charlie was not moved. “How’s Saturday night?”

Mick spluttered, splashing some of his drink on himself. “That’s one day away! No! You’re crazy! You’ve arranged it already haven’t you? Charles!’

“What?” The idiot at least managed to blush guiltily.

“Oh God. I don’t even want to see you right now.” He set his drink down on the counter top and headed to the couch, slumping into it. This was so messed up.

“Come on Mick…”

“No!”

“I’m sorry okay. But that was the only time he was free. He said he was pretty busy all month so I had no choice. It was Saturday or nothing really. Honest.”

“Who is he?”

“The guy who’s agreed to do… you know.”

Mick rolled his eyes. “I mean who is he supposed to be and where did you meet him?”

“Oh. Work dinner last Friday. He’s one of our biggest clients actually. He’s just fresh out of a relationship he said, looking for something fun to do so happy to make your dream come true.”

“My dream come true? That’s what you told him. Great. Just great. Now I’m going to have to sleep with someone who thinks I think he is a god.”

“Sorry. I had to tell him something.”

“Yeah, throw me under the bus...”

“Aww Mick.” Charlie called as the smaller man stood up and walked off. “It wasn’t like that…”

“Whatever.”

“So... we okay for Saturday?” he called out.

Persistent bastard. “Fine, Saturday night.”

“Err. It’s all day.” Charlie winced and closed his eyes tight, awaiting the reaction.

Mick was shocked beyond words now. He turned and stared at his boyfriend in shock and disappointment, questioning his relationship even more.

Charlie not only wanted someone else to fuck him; he wanted to have the guy over all day. All day? Without making sure he was okay with it first. What kind of boyfriend did that? Did Charlie not care about his feelings anymore?

It sure seemed like it.

He breathed deep. He felt like crying. “If I feel uncomfortable for even a second, I’m done.”

Charlie nodded.

* * * *

Friday felt like the longest day in Mick’s life. He regretted agreeing to this arrangement. He felt dirty, like he would be cheating on Charlie even though Charlie seemed so eager for it. It was all such a headache he could do without.

He didn’t understand his boyfriend at all. When Charlie had mentioned that he wouldn’t mind a threesome in the past, Mick had laughed it off thinking it was a joke. He didn’t want to do a threesome. He didn’t like that he was being coerced into doing what was against his own principles.

The problem really started when Mick’s older brother George had come to town for a week long consortium. He had let slip on the last night when they were celebrating his success that Mick liked really huge guys. Charlie had suddenly become even more preoccupied by it, now trying to use his proclivity against him.

Mick had only moved to London about a year ago to his dream job designing clothing and accessories for a well known brand. Charlie was one of the few friends he had made here, they met at his favorite coffee shop. He was unsure what Charlie did exactly but he knew it was something to do with tv broadcasting. At first they had just hung out at the coffee shop chatting, then Charlie kindly offered to show him around town to help him settle in.

Granted he was aware that Charlie was a bit manipulative. The man had somehow convinced him that they should share a flat. Charlie had steadily reminded him after he stated that he would prefer to wait out his tenancy term. He had almost convinced him to leave without ending the tenancy but Mick had refused to cheat his landlord out of the rent agreement. It had puzzled him at the time that Charlie wanted to share with him so badly but he had assumed it was a money thing.

He was happy to share the rent and bills. It helped him save for a rainy day anyway.

He had told Charlie he was gay from the start to avoid any confusion. He had learnt that it was better to have things out in the open when he met straight people, men especially. That way he was around people that wanted to be around him even with their knowledge of the way he was. Saved time and energy.

Charlie had been completely fine with it and had said that he had many gay friends. But he had never said he was gay as well. Not until about a month later, when a guy Mick was dancing with at a party asked for his number. Charlie had suddenly grabbed him and kissed him.

It had gone on from there and somehow here they were. Living together as a couple from the start of their relationship even though they were not really ready for that.

Charlie was 5”10, not close to huge in any shape or form but he was a lovely boyfriend most of the time and Mick liked him a lot.

He admitted he found huge men attractive but it certainly did not hold him back from living his life. Many people had a type but that didn’t mean they could not like other people too right? Granted he was not in love with Charlie but he hoped that it would grow into that soon. They had only been together 5 months after all.

Charlie was yet to say he loved him as well so it had all been steady going.

Now with this increasing threesome interest… Mick was seriously doubting the longevity of their relationship.

Their sex life was alright, he had only been with one guy before Charlie and even then it had taken him a long while to have full blown sex with Charlie after they had gotten tested.

Charlie had been lovely and patient all through that period, never pressuring him for sex. It was hard to relate his present behavior to how he had been then. How could someone who did not pressure you for sex suddenly become someone pressuring you to have sex with someone else?

It felt so wrong. He knew it was a bad idea, he couldn’t believe Charlie couldn’t see that. Maybe he didn’t care enough to worry about the effect this could have on their relationship? Should he really be with a guy who seemed to want to be with two?

It was even harder that he was too embarrassed to speak to his friends about it.

What if he hated the sight of him?

What if the guy hated the sight of him?

What if he knew him? Or worked with him?

He was just so confused. He just knew he was going to regret this.

* * * *

To be continued.